I went to a funeral this past week and what I heard was something that always frightens me a little bit, the effect of parenting on children. I heard grown children reflecting on the shortcomings of their father and the lasting impact this had in their lives. I happen to know this father and understand the reality they were talking about but I also know my own shortcomings and imperfections. In my time in ministry I have counseled quite a few people whose lives and their walk with God are deeply affected by their relationship with their earthly fathers. I always wonder how my own failings as a father will keep my children from fully knowing God the Father.
The effects of sin in my life are such that I lash out in anger and withhold affection at times when I am upset with my children. I have a responsibility to raise my kids in a way that teaches right and wrong and so I know that sometimes that means we have difficulty with one another and yet other times my anger is for reasons other than that. One of my kids carelessly backed out of the driveway and in the process hit my car. He was certainly remorseful for what he had done but that wasn't good enough for me this time. I was tired and emotionally worn out and my reaction wasn't Godly to say the least.
It amazes me always to read in the Gospels when Jesus has gone through tough times and still has resources and reserves of compassion with which he continues to minister when the crowds come to Him. I believe that abiding is the secret to that and yet I allow other things to take away my focus on Him and communion is temporarily interrupted and then I am prone to sin against others. Abiding is work but the work has a gigantic pay off. Parenting requires more abiding than I ever realized.
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