The answer to the question is, it depends when we are talking about sin. It depends on the person who has sinned. The difference is whether the person is a part of the believing community. When I consider the Gospels what I see is that if the person is outside the community grace leads the way and if they are inside then truth leads.
Matthew 5.38-42 tells us not to resist the one who is evil. That is where we get the idea of turning the other cheek. It is similar to killing someone with kindness. Similarly, Paul says in Romans 12.20, "if your enemy is hungry, feed him; if he is thirsty, give him something to drink; for by so doing you will heap burning coals on his head." Jesus deals with people differently when he meets them. The Samaritan woman at the well in John 4 is an outcast even from her community and Jesus leads with grace and then introduces the truth of her sin. With Zacchaeus, another outcast as a tax collector, grace leads. With the prostitute at the home of the Pharisee, grace is first, and on it goes.
Matthew 18.15-20 tells us how to deal with sin among believers, and truth, confronting sin, comes first. In 1 Corinthians 5.12 Paul says, "For what have I to do with judging outsiders? Is it not those inside the church whom you are to judge?" When Jesus meets a self-righteous person like a Pharisee, he confronts their sin first. When the apostles preach to a primarily Jewish audience their message nearly always includes "but this Jesus, whom you crucified..."
We have tended to miss this distinction in the church in our day and tolerated all manner of bad behavior in the church by excusing it, "That's just how so and so is." Sanctification requires change and change doesn't happen by excusing sin. If Christians behaved better towards one another, the world might actually believe we weren't complete hypocrites.
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